


Ghosts

by purplefox



Series: KakaNaru week 2016 [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-27
Updated: 2016-09-27
Packaged: 2018-08-18 04:17:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8148862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purplefox/pseuds/purplefox
Summary: Naruto and Kakashi are haunted from those that came before, but their hauntings are different





	

There were more departed than living, those just departed, those departed and forgotten they outnumbered those that lived to an astonishing degree. Humans were fragile creatures and they died so easily.

They left behind so much and the burden they left on the living… well they were ghosts for a reason. It was hard to deal with death as it was, for people like Kakashi who caused death and saw it, death was no real stranger to him. Taking a life was a well-known thing among shinobi, most of the time you had to, you just hoped that you could give a mercy killing if you were strong enough.

Of course having people around you die was not easy either. It was a hole in your life, that person gone forever, frozen in time the way they were remembered last. That was the real truth of it there, that was what it came down to, the dead were those left behind, frozen, to never change.

Sometimes the loss weighed you down, everywhere you looked you were reminded of the past and the memory of those people haunted you. It would become hard to look past the regrets and the pain simple because the time for that person had stopped forever.

There were good and bad type of ghosts. Bad types held you down, you were unable to move on past It, accept their loss or sometimes if you accepted their loss you became distant from the world, everything a reminder of what you had lost and of what you would never have again.

Ghosts were painful things to have.

Of course there were the good type of ghosts too, those that inspired you to keep living no matter how painful it was and damn was it agonising. Kakashi had lost so many people, his Father who he had loved and admired with all his heart.

Obito who he still blamed himself and his foolishness for, Rin who he had sworn to protect for Obito’s sake. The people who were like family to him, Kushina-san and Minato-sensei. He had felt cursed, his dreams had been filled with blood and for him they became his living ghosts, reminders of his foolishness and his failures.

He had not wanted any more to add to that number, his dearest people haunted his dreams and his decisions there really was no other option but to keep living and to do better but Naruto was different.

Maybe it was because of how Naruto was that he was able to accept it, maybe it was some inherited gene that gave more kindness than Kakashi knew what to do with, maybe it was Naruto’s deep well of compassion, whatever it was Naruto was different in every way.

His ghosts did not hold him back they pushed him forward, their deaths no matter who they were pushed Naruto on and inspired him, that inspired Kakashi it touched him and he felt his burden lighten every time he talked to Naruto.

Haku and Zabuza, Naruto carried them with him. Their lives and their regrets, he had known them for a short time but he had buried deep into their hearts and taken part of them with him, they were gone but in Naruto’s heart they remained.

Naruto used their deaths to fuel him and lead him down the right path, a path he would not regret and Kakashi had felt deep relief in his heart that Naruto would not stumble.

The death of the Sandaime gave birth to a leader in Naruto, granted it had started small but slowly Kakashi watched responsibility bloom in Naruto along with a strong big brother personality. He like the others mourned the Hokage but the longer he watched Naruto and how Naruto took the death the more he felt relief that Naruto was different.

He had been tempted the night after the funeral to confess to Naruto and tell him everything. Tell him about Minato-sensei and Kushina-san but instead he buried that thought deep and went along with life as they knew it.

But for Naruto it was different, at the corner of Kakashi’s eye at the corner of everything he had ghosts lurking. Regrets building high trailing blood and most of the time it woke him from his dreams, the regrets and the pain along with the horrific memories.

Naruto’s ghosts, Kakashi swore he could see them, gentle things just behind him nudging him forward, protecting him because there was no way one human could be so lucky. So many near misses Naruto had, Kakashi knew he had to be protected. Not just Minato-sensei and Kushina-san it had to be more than that.

All who knew and loved Naruto, they guided him, watched over him, supported him and his dreams and their faith created a barrier as well as continued on in Naruto. That was the difference between his ghosts and Naruto’s. they lit him up from the inside carried him high and forward.

They would be with him for life, they were not going to go anyway but they were supporting structure not a weight around the neck, they were the guiding light for Naruto, that was what these ghosts were. From Haku and Zabuza to Jiraiya-sama. They lived on and supported Naruto, because ghosts were really for the living.

The living needed to cope and so they took things from the departed so that they could continue to fight on, sometimes all they could take was the bad things the pain and the regrets and horror but Naruto was different. His will to continue was impressive and even in the face of so much pain he was able to smile on.

He never had a chance really.

Kind hearted Rin who had died by his hand in order to save the village, she haunted him constantly but Kakashi knew he had deserved it. His arrogance was what had abused it, he had broken his promise to Obito. He had not wanted to harm her, he would have gladly taken her place.

It was so strange that he had finally come to understand his father so long after the fact, maybe it had started with losing Rin. Maybe it was after the destruction of the village but all he knew was that when they came for Naruto he thought of his Father and smiled.

He knew the village had other things to think about at that moment but he found it funny that as they tore apart the village looking for Naruto that everyone did the same thing. He knew it would hurt Naruto when he returned, he knew that it would break his heart all over again, a heart that had only now started to heal but he hoped that deep inside him that he would become a good sort of ghost for Naruto.

That he would not hold him back or lead him down a path of anger and regret. That he would think of him and do the right thing, that he would continue to smile and walk on forward. It was a weird dying thought to have but he had spent his entire life not being normal anyway.

X

Don’t forget the dead and their sacrifices, a personal motto of his, no matter who they were and how they faced him life, Naruto was determined to never forget them and to forgive them, even when it was harder that anything he had ever experienced.

He had thought he had known pain and hatred; he had thought he knew it all but he knew better now. He wrapped his arms tightly around Kakashi-sensei’s neck and inhaled deeply, he shuddered at the familiar scent and he hid his face into the man’s covered neck as his tears flowed.

He had almost sacrificed it all for his rage, he had never been more thankful for his master and his sensei before, because without them, he would have never managed to make things right and he would have never understood how he really felt.

X

He was at peace with his father, Minato-sensei had made him realize a few more things, he had moved past Obito. His dreams were still painful but he had let go most of his pain. Kakashi hummed as he washed his hands in the sink.

He remembered the nights he had woken panicked convinced his hand was bloody, the voice of Rin in his head but not the Rin he had known, an accusing hating Rin, right in her hatred and anger.

It had taken a long time but his ghosts were no longer the heavy painful things they had been and that could be attributed to Naruto. There had been no real choice there, when faced with the twisted person Obito had become, Kakashi had chosen Naruto. Naruto would not become them, that was what Kakashi was there for.

Naruto’s ghosts were helpful things that empowered him, even if it was painful for a bit, Naruto would continue on, that was what Kakashi was there for.

X

“I think this is too much of an offering.” Naruto hissed as he cracked open one eye. They had the day off and he had planned to get around to the graves eventually but Kakashi had been the one almost desperate to come.

“No.” Kakashi said softly and Naruto knew that the man was smiling behind his mask. “It’s just enough.” He finished and Naruto sighed as the man kept his eyes closed and his hands clasped as they prayed. “In fact, it may not be enough when you think about it.”

“Are you saying my Mom was a glutton?” Naruto asked dryly as he finished his prayer, he smiled at the grave as he stood up slowly.

“Well, she could pack it away.” Kakashi mused and Naruto snorted as he looked over to his Dad’s grave.

“Did you finish asking for forgiveness?” Naruto asked softly because he knew Kakashi, the man had always been quiet but Naruto knew the look of someone dealing with demons.

“I’ve been doing that for a long time.” Kakashi laughed softly before he shook his head. “I just wanted to thank them.” His tone was so reverent that Naruto’s cheeks caught fire and he glared at the sky, he forgot how easily Kakashi could say such happy things now. “I just wish they could have seen us and I wish Kushina-san could have been at the wedding.”

“She would have loved it, I only talked to her for a bit but it was enough. Mom would have loved it.” Naruto smiled.

“Exactly.” Kakashi said softly. “They would have been happy that I managed to find happiness, whether Sensei would have been fine with it being his son… well lightning haven’t struck me yet.” He chuckled as he grabbed Naruto’s hand in his free one. Naruto laughed as their fingers entwined as they stood together facing the graves in the early morning. A light tug got him moving with Kakashi and from the corner of his eye he saw something.

He ignored Kakashi’s curious noise as he looked back at the collection of graves. He did not know the older man standing there but his hair and his smile made him release a started sound. He did not know the short girl personally but he had seen that picture in Kakashi’s bedroom too many times to not make the connection… the others he knew especially the couple in the back. Ero-sennin had his hands on their shoulders as he grinned at Naruto and his Dad had his Mom pulled to him as they smiled. His Mom was giving him a thumbs up and Naruto felt tears flow down his cheeks. He looked next to him to see that Kakashi’s eyes were wide, he saw the same thing he did and when small Obito and Rin gave their thumbs up before disappearing, Naruto gave his husband’s hand a gentle squeeze. He guessed that Kakashi had just gotten his own answer, he looked as he had gotten a weight off his shoulder.


End file.
